Shit

sobrang dami
nakakasusulasok
nakababagot
nakaiinis

kung ganoon lang
pinaalam na sana
at nang ‘di nagisip
at nang ‘di na nagparaya

ang buhay ay ‘di pabula
na parang bahay-bahayan
na maaring ipagpaliban
pag pagod o pagal na

ang di ko mawari
ay ang ideya
na sa ganito lamang pupunta
ang telenobela.

Disclaimer

To avoid further misunderstanding and to lessen the hate messages I get, I would like to formally announce,

THAT I FUCKING LOVE TO WRITE FICTION.
SO I FUCKING HAVE THE FUCKING PROPENSITY TO WRITE THINGS
WHICH ARE NOT ABOUT ANY PARTICULAR PERSON.

*ehem ehem*

So please don’t hate me Juan dela Cruz. The world does not revolve around you.

The Works II

I will then stay away
you are just another slab
of meat, anyway

Dark

To float and to drift
seems to be thine destiny
Float, drift, then sink

Pasensiya na

Haiku lang muna
Maraming gustong sabihi’ng
Hindi lantaran

There’s Time When One’s Just Gotta Stop

I have been receiving quite a number of messages from a number of people saying that I should stop blogging. They say that yeah, I may write funny and they have some entertaining value, but my entries sound that they were written by some convoluted mind.

Being the egalitarian me, I acknowledged their existence, their grievance, and reassured them that I am holding on my own. But there’s just some guys who just don’t know when to stop.

I mean, we are all entitled to our own opinion, and we do have the right to try to influence-slash-convince others to align their thought with our views, but theres time when one’s just gotta stop.

Inasmuch as we want our opinions to be respected, we must also try to respect the disposition of others.

Given that, I would like to request the four of you to please stop sending me messages that tell me to not consider committing suicide.

I friggin’ won’t. 

Jeeezus Kuhrreist.

Eagle Street

What’s hapening to you?

I know that my moral fiber
was made in China
but I try to
hold
on to it
as hard as I can.
Concupiscence
is an annoying fact of life but
I just have to go against it
because I have a fairly
good idea of what I
wanna be and I
have decided
to do all
possible
ways to
be like
that
someday.
Not for any goddamn
archaic, complex reason
Not for any sort of social
recognition, not for any
attempt at validation
but solely for the
fact that I am a
man who has
principles,
i will live
life with
those
by
my
side.

But I just went against one, and it feels so bad.

Further Down Eagle Street

Will get through this
I know I will
When there is naught
Though time stands still

Finding meaning
in one mere tryst
shall be nothing
but one more heist

It might be true
but it is late
and wisdom’s rue
is not of faith

One could just heed
and hope in chance
and find some light
in this, this trance

Conscience, Limbo
Core in despair
Fears the morrow
and dest’ny’s fare

It might have led
it might have not
but hope has fled
this poor, sad lot.

Happiness nigh,
but right be done
Thy smile, goodbye
Lest all be gone.

`Nay ko po!

My father died five years ago. We all mourned, but we have learned, though with difficulty, to move on. My mom thought that she never would remarry. We told her that it was okay to remarry, as we can’t promise that we can’t be with her at all times. We grow up, and fate may lead us to very very different paths.

One day when the whole world woke up, she has suddenly married someone whose name my sibilings and I do not even know and whose face we have never seen.

It was a secret ceremony with no one given notice but my mom’s mother and siblings. The rest of us felt betrayed. We could not possibly understand why on earth can she bear not telling us. She should have remembered that we have the right to know because we are her children, and that we still breathe.

We were plain stunned.The irony of the matter is, on the day after the wedding, I came home to the province, saw her, and yet she never mentioned about it. I was clueless at that point, thinking that it was just another one of my many visits to what I called home.

I was mistaken.

I am the talkie type. I regularly have conversations with our employees. I treat them as equals, seeing that our only difference is the availability of opportunity. Due to that, they refard me as one of their friends, that they can freely tell me anything without fearing for their livelihood.

One of them came up to me and asked if I already knew that I have a new stepdad. My jaws dropped,  I almost fainted.I headed straight back to Manila without saying goodbye to anyone.

It has been a while since I last spoke with her, and I’ve realised that I cannot go on like this. So I have resolved to go back home, talk to her again, and iron things out.

I love my mom, but I can’t help but feel like I am an Osbourne.

Or maybe the Osbournes fared better, I do not know.

Life has a wicked sense of humor.

Wish me luck I could use some.

*****************************
This has been written months and months ago so please do not blurt out unsolicited pep talk as they are already obsolete.  Thank you

The Last of Eagle Street

Nasusulasok.
Nakadidiring Lugar
Lalayo na `ko